Where do you want to take your team to?

In an organization, the way a team interacts and works is a direct consequence of years of activity, practice and experience.
The specific characteristics of the team have slowly being defining and building: shared criteria, beliefs, judgments, accepted roles, common behaviours, attitudes.
Up to the unique style of communication, exchange, collaboration and work environment that exist today in the company.

There comes a time when it may be important to clarify and renew these practices and update the objectives, references, values ​​and behaviours of the team.
And it's not easy to do so from inside, because you are part of the system.

To change and improve team efficiency and results, coaching and mentoring can be interesting tools for the manager in that they allow to reflect on what is happening on a day to day basis.
Reflect on how it is being experienced by the executive.
Reflect on how it is being experienced by the team.

The coaching process allows to clarify where the executives and their teams are doing well and where perhaps they may need to adapt, change, improve their interactions and relationships.

Coaching accompanies executives in defining their vision, what they want for them and for their team, where they want to take it to...
 It facilitates the change and renewal processes of the team.
 It facilitates the executive's change and renewal process.
What about you?
Are you satisfied with your team?
How do you see it? Its motivation? What results is it achieving?

What do you want? Where do you want to take your team to?

Are conflicts acceptable?

  We generally think that harmony is desirable in any organization:
- The atmosphere is friendly, it's more comfortable for employees, there are no direct and open confrontations
- Managers' authority is not challenged, based on the idea that if you have no conflicts, leadership and command are being respected by the teams.
Avoiding conflict is basically positive...Up to a point...
It becomes a real problem when potentially important business issues, tensions or information that could be revealed, raised, debated, actually remain unspoken, silenced, and never subject to discussion ...
Then the corporate culture is one of superficial harmony...
In such a context, who might be willing to raise a hand, ask a question, raise an issue?

The company is paralysed by inertia and routine ....
What are the consequences or costs for the organization?
What critical commercial, operational, strategic, organizational issues remain in silence? And never appear in the light of day?
A somewhat political environment, a rigid management, a misconception confusing leadership with authority can shut people up and silence many ideas or initiatives of interest ... 
Businesses today cannot afford missing new development, improvement or innovation opportunities ...
As an entrepreneur or manager...
Say No to the sterile personal and political conflicts  ....
But say Yes to open debate, promote lively and productive discussions for the good of the company
...Even if they may create conflict!
How do you see it? Do you agree?
How do you handle conflict in your business?

Leadership: Are you enjoying yourself?

Working a lot with executives, I often wonder about Leadership...

What’s the difference between a manager and a leader?
How does it work? What’s so magical about it?

Of course, to act and have impact as leaders, entrepreneurs and managers need to have personal qualities and abilities, they need to have values, drive, ambition...
But beyond that, for me, there is definitely one common and indispensable condition for a true and powerful leadership to happen: 
Leaders have to enjoy being where they are.

Can you inspire people if you’re not enjoying being around with them?
Can you motivate them if you’re not yourself having fun and being ambitious about what you’re doing and achieving?

And it’s not just about having fun.
Enjoying being there means being aligned with your values, being coherent with yourself... it means caring about the others, the team, the customers...It means contributing to the world in a way that is totally yours, in a unique way.

And when you are really and ambitiously enjoying yourself, you are creating a context, a link, an energy, a space where people can feel inspired, attracted, motivated, energized... where people are able  to take risks, to go the extra mile...
Then you’re demonstrating leadership.

How are you in your current position? 
Are you enjoying yourself? Are you inspiring and motivating others?

Wise Leadership: The paradox of pushing

Too much force will backfire. Constant interventions and instigations will not make a good group. They will spoil the group.

The best group process is delicate. It cannot be pushed around. It cannot be argued over or won in a fight.
The leader who tries to control the group through force does not understand group process. Force will cost you the support of the members.

Leaders who push think they are facilitating process, when in fact they are blocking process.

They think that they are building a good group field when in fact they are destroying its coherence and creating factions.
They think that their constant interventions are a measure of ability, when in fact such interventions are crude and inappropriate.
They think that their leadership position gives them absolute authority, when in fact their behaviour diminishes respect.

The wise leader stays centered and grounded and uses the least force required to act effectively. The leader avoids egocentricity and emphasizes being rather than doing.

Lao Tsu: The Tao of Leadership

The Power of Vulnerability

What does your client want, really?

Do you really listen?
Are you curious and open enough to listen?

Sometimes I'm amazed by the attitude of some sales people.
They are so focused on their products, offers and promotions that they tend to forget about the only thing that really matters, the customer!

For years the economy was thriving, there was money and optimism ... The commercial just needed to know how to fill in order forms ....

Now that is more complicated, when confidence is missing, these attitudes do not work ...

In what state is your client?

What do you feel?
Does he have the power to decide?
Who else can influence the purchase decision?
WIIIFM? What's in it for him in this sale?
What is at stake for him?
What are the risks he's taking with this?

But above all, in general .... What does he want?

Do you have a good understanding of what he wants or have you been too focused on your stuff (your goals, your offerings, competition, ..), and blinded by the pressure and stress to close the sale?

Beyond your products and services, connect with your customers.
Hear what they say and try to perceive what they do not tell you ... The key to your success may well be there.

What do you think your customer really wants?

What impact does stress have on you?

    For optimum proactivity and performance, it is important for a collaborator to be independent and interdependent, to be able to add value, collaborate, to easily and fluently interact with others.

   In a previous post we have defined this position for communication as "+ / +". It's a positive way of relating with others with openness, cooperation and respect. (link post http://authenticity-marc.blogspot.com.es/2012/05/how-do-you-relate-to-others.html).

   When difficulties, uncertainty and conflicts arise, when the levels of pressure and requirement increase, the usual position of communication may be impacted and change.

   All the more professional, competent and "great communicators" they may be, employees may gradually fall into states of exhaustion and stress.

Effects of pressure and stress
on the team members' behaviours

   Then the natural and efficient "+/+" posture, depending on the personality of each one, may "fall" into positions of "defence" like:

- "+ / -": More authoritarian, more demanding and rigid, to extremes can become arrogant and aggressive, or

- "- / +": the opposite, more passive, quiet, dependent, with possible loss of confidence and sense of inferiority.

   The general impact is clearly a loss in the efficiency and agility of the individuals and teams.

On a personal level, how does this sound to you?
When you're under stress, in what schemes do you tend to fall?
When you do, what would your needs be?

How do you relate to others?

What position do you adopt in your relationships?
How do you relate? How do you usually relate?
What positions do you have in your relationships?

The balance in a relationship comes from the ability people have to communicate and listen, from their levels of openness and trust.
You can perceive a relationships you are having in 4 different basic ways: - / -, - / +, + / - and + / +.

The first sign symbolizes the image that a person has of himself in the relationship.The second symbolizes the image he has of the other person.

These types of relationship do not define the reality but the inside perception of one person  facing another person.
Thus:

1 - Position - / - is totally negative, a relationship of pessimism and depression.  
2 - Position - / + is a strong feeling of being inferior, submitted.
3 - The + / - is the opposite, a perception of superiority, authority, aggressiveness and arrogance.
4 - The position + / + is one of cooperation and openness. It is the place where starts autonomy and personal development.

The position of life + / + allows

• accepting yourself and accepting others as they are
• connecting and being close to others
• having the appropriate level of confidence in oneself
• adopting an attitude of openness and negotiation

It is the basic ingredient for interdependence, the starting point of personal leadership. It's the position of assertive leaders capable of Win-Win relationships and alliances.

How do you perceive your current relationships with others?
Is something missing for you to be 100 per cent in the + / +?

What's preventing you from meeting your objectives?

There are few moments in life when we have clarity.
Clarity about what we want, what motivates us. About the direction to take. About our dreams, ambitions, goals. Clarity that gives us enthusiasm, connection, energy ...

When we experience clarity, it's magical. Everything is simple, spot on, crystal clear...

But... life gets in the way ... What happens? 

We start to hear our internal rumours ... our internal skeptics think we are crazy, nuts, unrealistic, our saboteurs tell us we can't make it, our victimism convinces us it is too dangerous, we'll fail ...

External noises follow up ... our friends think our ideas are great but totally crazy... our families look at us with disapproval and anxiety ...

So before even starting to dig into what is really important to us, you may decide it will not be feasible, not worth wasting time, just not possible. You already give up !

When was the last time you had a moment of clarity?

What brakes prevented you from going for your goals?

What is your energy level?

Do you have too much energy? Or not enough? 
Are you overwhelmed or do you lack energy?

When aligned and harmonious, your vital energy will make you move mountains
Misdirected, it may frustrate and paralyze you.

Where are you putting your energy?
    Do you use it to stay afloat, to keep up with the beat, maintain your routine and life style, save face, hold on to your position?

   ...or ..
    Do you invest in what matters to you, in your projects, in what you have inside and is yet to fully discover, in what may emerge and transform into your future personal successes ...

And how do you manage your energy?
    Do you relentlessly consume it up to exhaustion? Are there weekends when you are so exhausted that you entirely spend them trying to relax, recover, sleep...?.
   ...or ...
    Do you try and manage your energy level one moment after another, step by step, trying to keep a balance between the obligations your agenda imposes you and your biological rhythm, between your ambition, your drive and your inner rythm ... taking brief moments of relaxation and rest, disconnecting, taking care of yourself...?

Whatever the answer, don't blame yourself, you're doing the best you can .But if you think of it for a minute ....
What would be your commitment to yourself in managing your vital energy?

Do you allow yourself to doubt?

  There are moments when we can be uncomfortable, misaligned, lost, distrustful ... when we may live more in our heads than in the real world ....
  These moments may be necessary to help you step back on your life, on your desires and dreams and connect with what is important to you ...
  It then may be difficult to go in the outside world, interact with others ...the world does not easily admit  people who doubt or who are in a personal search...Looking for your path may appear unprofessional, immature, unwise ... may be a pain for others ... No wonder you struggle to go out and share with others the deficiencies and doubts you have...
  While these are the moments when you might need the most attention and support, when sharing with others could help...

  When you're doubting or feeling stuck, you're like in a tunnel, and it is difficult to open your perception on other perspectives, other points of view, other paradigms ...
If one of your friends is in a similar situation, listen to him with empathy and patience ... if he agrees to be open at this point you may well help him by accompanying him through his possible options ...

Accept the moments of doubt ... Yours and others' ....
Doubting is the opportunity to explore and discover what's inside you, who you can become... and how to be yourself ...
Allow yourself to doubt!
Take the opportunity to be yourself!

What if doubting was the entry-point to self-knowledge and personal growth?
What do you think?

You fight for your company. What about your team?

You're willing to fight for the company ... And you do ...
What about your team? Are they fighting with you?
Or do you have the impression you're mostly getting everything done ...

How to share the responsibilities?
How to empower collaborators?

The management skills are a very subtle balance between inspiration, confidence, risk taking, rhythm, flowing, intimacy, responsibility and leadership.

If the director is imposing his vision and solutions too much, he will find difficult to:
- Fully understand everything that is happening,
- Really engage employees,
- Get improvements, ideas or innovations.

The team leader has to accept everything that is present in the team, all there is ... the positive and constructive ... the negative and confrontational ....
Accept and welcome everything as possibly exceptional learning opportunities ...

Accepting this uncertainty and risk taking will give influence and power to the leader ...
More like a conductor than a standard line manager...

To achieve this as leaders, they'll need to open up, connect with the team with all their humanity and accept to show their potential vulnerability...
Do you feel you've achieved it?
Are you willing to try?
Is it relevant for you?

What is your intimate reality?

We people tend to lose ourselves in our thoughts, to live in the past and be thoughtful, nostalgic, or may be fulfilled about it ... or to be in the future, enthusiastic, excited, or worried, anxious ...

We rarely live the present, here and now. We lost the ability we had as children to live intensely in the moment, being 100% alive in the present.

The only part of us that is always in the moment is our body. It never gets lost in either the past or in the future. It is here, now. It is. It's our only irrefutable reality.

Continuously our body communicates to us our feelings, our emotions, signals how we are at this time and how we are getting on in our lives.

It communicates us whether we are happy, enthusiastic, energetic, present .... If we are on track, if we are forcing too much or not enough ...also if we get away from our track, if we don't take care or lie to ourselves...

These signs can be soft and diffuse. They can also be strong and violent signals.

Our challenge is to understand what our body tells us, and it is not easy because in general we've been telling our stories for some time... We tend to live our life in our heads ...where our vision and our interpretation of our reality have been forged.

Our reality is our body's reality.
Our path is to understand it.

Breathe. Listen to your body.
Breathe Authenticity What about you? Do you listen to your body? 

Do you hide behind any mask?

Is there a consensual harmony in your business? or are there conflicts?

Is there a consensus based harmony? 
Or are there conflicts driven by commitment or passion?
Which do you prefer?

Nobody likes conflicts.
Many times we tend to remain in a status quo before putting controversial issues on the table.
Do they accept conflict in your steering committee?
Are open and thorough debates possible? Do they really take place?

Conflicts are difficult experiences for anyone and yet, in today's business world, they may well be vital.
I'm not talking about political conflict or conflict of egos or personalities ...
I'm talking about conflicts driven by the commitment for excellence, for results, for the company, for the team ...
The conflict that may pave the way for breakthrough, innovative and really competitive ideas or solutions!

In your company
What is still left to discuss, to decide?
What issues have not been spoken?
What issues are not addressed not to break the "harmony"?

Implement the conditions of trust, team spirit and commitment to transform conflicts into benefits!

How do you present yourself?

Who are you? How is the story you tell?

When I am asked the question, I lose myself in the thousands of ways I could interpret and reinterpret myself.
How do I define myself?
How do I want to define myself and introduce myself to others?

What justifications provide consistency to my story?
What justifications do I wish to express to the other ...to others?

What do I want to show? Demonstrate? Or hide?

Sometimes these concealments and justifications change depending on each person, on each context, according to the entourage, the scenario, the events ... We have many dimensions and we play multiple roles, constantly switching from one to another ...

How to simplify your life?
Take the masks off!
Isn't there a way to limit the multifaceted and constant roles you play ?Now what?
What stories are you telling me? What stories are you telling yourself?
How do you tell yourself your story?

Would you say you are a person who is "authentic"?

Do you consider yourself an "authentic person"?
What could "be authentic" mean?
Let me suggest some definitions


   To know and accept yourself


Knowing your values, interests, passions, your desires, your mission.
Identifying and accepting your own saboteurs, fears, weaknesses, lies, self-justifications.


   To live freely and consciously


Being aware of your feelings, emotions, intuitions, wishes, being aware of your body, welcoming and managing everything in you
Accepting the unknown, the uncertainty, the humor, enjoying, being grateful.


  To lead and manage yourself

Having fun, living a conscious life connected to everything that happens inside, outside, and feeling how all this resonates in you. Managing your energy level, your balance, rhythm, breathing, loving and taking care.of yourself  


How are you in relation to all this?
What do you do naturally, on a regular basis? Where do you struggle?


How do you see yourself? Is something missing for you in this description?

Is there an atmosphere of suspicion in your business?

When a difficulty arises, a problem occurs, do people try to find who’s responsible?
Do collaborators fight not to be related to mistakes made? Are they afraid of being compromised?

The pressure for results and operational excellence and the rigid top-down management styles lead to feelings and behaviours of fear and guilt.

These attitudes consume a lot of energy throughout the organizations and paralyze their development potential. They block all creativity and limit their capacity for improvement and innovation.

How do managers address and handle mistakes or underachievement?
Do they identify and share lessons learned?
Or do they look for accountabilities and justifications?
How’s your organisation doing on these aspects?

How do you lead teams? What would you change?

How do you lead teams?
Do you give information? Do you explain the decisions?
Do you try to convince? Do you inform of how things are?

Or rather
Do you share with them about what's going on?
Do you try to understand how things are going, how they do it, what they think?
Do you collect information about the activity, the strategy, the work environment?

Where are your priorities? 
Are they to be recognized, respected and listened to as a manager?
Are they to implement and maintain the best conditions to achieve lasting results?

And for this,
Do you try to convince or to understand?
Do you give instructions or do you share?

Take a moment.
If your team was asked how you are as a leader, what do you think they would say?
Try for a moment to be in their perspective, to imagine their perception of the company and of you.
And don't be upset ... You're doing the best you can ... Take it as a fantastic learning opportunity.

What do you learn? What do you detect? Or not detect?
What would you change?
What are you happy and comfortable about?
And what lessons and challenges do you identify for you?

Be yourself the best way you can.

What’s in you? What’s specific in you, what’s special?
What treasures, what wealth do you have?
What makes you different?. What are your imperfections?.

What's your story? How do you tell  it? 

How do you to understand it, give sense to it, justify it?
Where are your wounds, your tensions?
Who are your saboteurs? What are your sufferings?
What are your beliefs, your obsessions?

What position do you have, what posture?. How do you relate to others?.
How do you appear, what do you want to demonstrate? To whom?

Breathe in. Investigate yourself. Set aside the inner critic, the negative little voices ...
Take off the inertia, see, experiment, experience, act ...

Listen, feel your body, the feelings you have, the tension, the weight.
When are you lightness, agility, flexibility ..?.
When are you enthusiasm, spontaneity, life?

Take time to slowly discover yourself.
Know yourself and grow.
Find out how you want to contribute to the world, society, company, to other people ...
What do you value? 

What is your vision? 

What is your mission?